My guilt overwhelms me—it is a burden too heavy to bear. My wounds fester and stink because of my foolish sins. - Psalm.38:4-5 NLT
Have you ever made the mistake of leaving something a little too long in the refrigerator and been reminded by an unmistakable rotting odor sometime later? So you go rooting around in the fridge until you find the offending item to get rid of it. Sometimes the odor has permeated other items and you end up having to get rid of some items that would otherwise have been "good" had they not been in the same place as that smelly item.
Well, so are some of those things we have buried and forgotten or refused to deal with. Those things that happened so long ago that though they still affect our behavior, the actual event was never dealt with. How about those things we did to someone else that because it happened so long ago, we think that an apology now would be fruitless? Maybe those things we've kept hidden for fear of being judged by others, we refuse to deal with.
Anything hidden will come to light. How so? By the behaviors that have grown out of that manure that we don't even recognize are a direct result of the hidden offense/offender. Have we become promiscuous, but can't pinpoint why? Do we immediately turn to negativity as a defense mechanism? Have alcohol or drugs become a balm to soothe a deep ache? Do we denigrate another as a way to make ourselves look better? Has pornography become a crutch to achieve sexual fulfillment? All these, and so many more, are merely the symptoms of deep-seated hurts that were never faced, either as the offender or the victim. And just like that offending item in the fridge, it can affect so much else that would otherwise have been good, but now carries the taint of that "rotting secret."
This past Sunday we were asked to search ourselves. Sometimes those journeys within are less than pleasant. In truth, they can be downright traumatic, but in order for complete healing to take place, it must be performed. Tears will fall, feelings may get hurt, divisions may arise, but eventually healing will come if the root is dealt with correctly, that is, in the light of God's Word.
These spiritual and emotional "surgeries" cannot take place lightly, for if misguided, they may cause more harm than good and the healing purpose sought becomes even farther away and may even become more septic. Any deep seeking must always be done under the guidance of the Holy Spirit and the anointed Word of God. When man undertakes such tasks without the guidance of the Hand of God, perceptions can be skewed, false memories can be introduced, and myriad other forms of damage can occur.
But when it's done right, oh the freedom, the healing, the rebirth! It's like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon, struggling to be free, but when finally free from its prison, its lithe beauty is a wonder to behold, often blessing others by its very presence.
Search your heart, do you need to go under the Surgeon's knife? Unsure? Take a look in the mirror, or take stock of how you behave or react. Study your actions or methods and see if you do something that, until now, you've never questioned its reasoning. Your healing could be right around the corner, but because you're "smelly," instead, everyone can tell that you're right around the corner. You may not think that there is anything wrong, yet you wonder why "certain" people react certain ways around you. Could it be something you're giving off?
We have too many wounded warriors going into battle not recognizing that we have holes in our armor, or that we're bleeding under the armor. We have too many battles ahead of us to go in so ill-prepared. There are many men and women of God who are fully equipped to aid in these journeys, but seek God first before seeking them out. Sometimes God wants to do this healing without any other human interaction...but you won't know unless you ask.
Cleaning out the fridge is not a pleasant task, but it is necessary, especially if something is spoiling the pleasant experience you expected when you opened it. The same with life, it can be pleasant, but if something unpleasant is in the way, it can spoil the entire experience.